Envy
by Cy Fur
Summary: Yuna tries to ignore the bite of envy. Part of the 7 Deadly Sins. Rikku/Paine, Yuna/Tidus.


**I do not own Final Fantasy X2 or any characters thereof, and will not be making any money off of them.**

Rikku and Paine are not exactly the type to be all lovey-dovey in public, and Yuna is grateful to this, unbelievably grateful for this, because she always feels a tiny stab of jealousy in the back of her mind whenever she sees a couple, any couple, holding hands and kissing and being romantic. When she sees Paine unceremoniously hand Rikku a white daisy, sees Rikku blush and stand on tiptoe to kiss Paine on the mouth and put the flower behind her ear, she feels something sharp and bright, like a piece of broken glass, in the base of her skull, something that makes her fingers shake. When she finds the dried flower in a book, weeks later, she shreds it, and then hates herself for it.

She's grateful they're discreet. She knows, her friend and her cousin have every right for happiness. But that dopey expression Paine gets on her face when she thinks nobody is looking reminds Yuna of Tidus, and she knows it's stupid, because aren't other couples entitled to love? Her sweet side, the side she thinks of sometimes (in the privacy of her own head) as Lady Summoner is happy for them, really, thrilled that Paine is finding happiness after such a hard life, ecstatic that Rikku is lost in the throes of first love. But the little mean side of her, the side that usually cocks the gun and shoots it, that's the little piece of glitter-sharp that flashes, and she feels it, like… like a bullet, actually, embedded somewhere deep and important, almost rotting from the inside.

It's late at night. It's late at night and Yuna can't sleep, for one reason or another. But she's wide awake, staring at the ceiling and trying to get back into that empty place you always go when you're trying to fall asleep. She hears a giggle and then a quiet thump, and then she sees Rikku's dark shape pad out of her bed, walk around Yuna's bed and towards Paine's. Then she's climbing into Paine's bed, and Yuna isn't too… worried, because the two of them sleep together (literally sleep; she doesn't know about their sex life, nor does she want to) fairly regularly. It isn't until she hears a certain type of wet… sound that she realizes what is going on.

So what should Yuna do? Should she make some kind of noise, let the young lovers (and oh god, they're lovers, and she knew this on an intellectual level but she doesn't want to know it from observation) know that, well, their best friend is lying on the bed next to theirs, hearing them kiss, hearing Rikku whimper as Paine does… _something. _Yuna doesn't want to think about that. She knows a bit about sex between women; knows of strong fingers and warm mouths. But she doesn't want to think about Rikku and Paine that way, because… They're her friends. Her _friends, _and the small throbbing thing at the base of her skull-heart is like a beating heart, pumping her full of jealousy because it isn't _fair. _Why does Rikku get a happy ending?

She wants to cover her ears, but even when she does, it's like she can hear it all in her head. Every muffled moan, every quiet whine, it brings back a memory. A memory with thorns and sweetness intertwined, of, well, quiet. Quiet moans and muffled whimpers, of Tidus' calloused hands on her hips and his warm mouth on her neck. Only then they were behind a tree, late at night, and they were quiet-quiet-quiet, although Kimahri probably knew their intentions the moment Yuna crawled out of her bedroll.

Rikku makes this groaning-gasping noise, and Yuna rolls onto her side, hoping the noise of her shifting about might… discourage them, or at least get them to move somewhere where she _isn't. _But they apparently can't hear her or they don't see her or they just don't care. Yuna peeks one eye open, because maybe she's imagining things, right? Only… no, she isn't' imagining things, because Rikku's on top of Paine, straddling her and kissing her, and one of Paine's hand is… Yuna shudders, a full body shudder, and is it disgust or jealousy? She hates this feeling, she really hates feeling so… nasty, so spiteful and venomous.

"Oh sweet Yevon, Rikku…" Paine's voice is shivery-shuddery, and she moans, choking off the loud bit at the end of it.

At this point, something in Yuna snaps. She clears her throat, loudly.

There are hurried shuffling noises in the bed next to her, and even that sends a little bolt to Yuna's heart, because she remembers carefully pulled into place clothing, attempting to tie ribbons and u-muss hair.

"Sorry, Yunie," Rikku says, her voice is sheepish. Paine's blush and angry silence are speaking volumes in and of themselves.

Yuna rolls onto her other side and doesn't say anything, and in the morning she'll smile and maybe she'll even gently tease Rikku or Paine a bit, because that's what a friend does. But for now, she curls in a little ball under her blankets and lets the bile run through her veins.


End file.
